Daughter of Christ

It's hard to admit that I'm a daughter of the Almighty and perfect God.

It's hard to realize that the blessed Messiah would pour his perfect and holy blood for my salvation

I guess the whole point of being a Christian is to admit that we don't deserve it.

But I feel like I don't deserve anything

I don't know where I'm going with this. But my dear blog, I just want to record that it was hard, today.

It is a constant battle to refrain from being engulfed of every single insecurity that I have.
It hurts so so much

How profound it is to not be missed
How troublesome it is to not be loved
By the worldly figures of shared blood
For the eyes betrayed the heart with tears of perceived sorrow
seemingly
I believed
But deep down I always knew
That one day I would be looking for you
You
Who ever you are
Him
Her
Me
Myself
Who are you?

I can't help but cry
I feel the heaviness of my eyes grow puffy and dry
But I can't waste my time with pitiful why's
Because why isn't the only answer

I suppose there's no moral yet,
But all in time will I understand
who
For such worldly things are above my head
And such understandings are but yet,
The only key to understanding distress

So I will rest my heart
Rest my soul
And save my smile

Because apparently, we're not alone in this crazy world. And despite all of the silly assumptions of character and knowledge, we all don't get it. Hah, we just don't.
Is something that my friends and I say.

I guess no matter how impossible life seems, we're all given the gift of emotions.
We are given the gift to be hurt, and to feel love because it is what we deeply, deeply desire.
I will save my smile. I guess for the sake of myself
But mostly because, I truly have a reason to. As does every one else.
So chin up,
Because this hurt is the outcome of a gift
Not a burden
Just because we don't like something, doesn't mean that it can't teach us anything.
-Reyna