This is Hope Hall
Hope Hall is going to be my new home for the next 9 or so months. I will be living on the north side, second floor, Anchored.
I am beyond excited to be able to spend this next chapter in my life in one of the most nice and beautiful dorms on campus.
Oh yeah, and Hope is actually co-ed! Woo! Living in an all girl's dorm was really not as bad as everyone thinks it is. However! I am still really stoked!!
I want to take this blog post and rewind to exactly a year ago in this time period. It was approaching the beginning of the fall semester and I was seeing all of these advertisements for college move-in day; the stores, television, billboards...it was EVERYWHERE.
The more I saw "College Move-In Day" stuff, the more depressed I became.
I started taking college classes when I was 16 years old. I physically graduated and finished my high school experience on the grounds of a community college campus. I graduated with High Honor Roll from high school while simultaneously making the Dean's List for my college classes. When I saw that the rest of my classmates and friends were all moving away to college, I was heart broken. It was a very hard time in my life, and it was most necessary for me to make the most devastating decision to stay home for a semester and transfer into a university in the middle of the year.
The Fall semester of 2013 was really the hardest time in my life. I will not go into extreme detail, but it was definitely very, very hard.
My brother was diagnosed with cancer, my family went through a very tough financial crisis that almost left us without a home, my grandmother passed away from cancer, and the depression that was physically eating away at my brain took a stronger hold of my being. It was the first time in my life where suicide became a very considerable option. I WILL NOT underplay how serious suicide is. I have lost those who were close to me from this, and I have had very close friends of mine who are survivors of this terrible and horrific tragedy.
I went to my awesome adult doctor (pshh, I am passed the pediatrician business), and she suggested therapy. Ironically enough, since therapy is my future career choice, I found that it really didn't work out too much for me. Yes, I do learn a lot from it, but I'm more fascinated about the methods and techniques rather than bettering myself. Yeahh I'm weird.
At the time, I have been STRONGLY against taking anti-depressives for myself. But as my brain was only decaying more and more, I really had no other choice than to finally give in. (the medication actually started in the summer of 2014)
I felt like a failure. All of my friends were moving away to beautiful universities and I was still stuck at the same community college that I went to since I was 16. I felt not good enough. I felt like I was too stupid and unworthy of reaching high opportunities. I felt like a loser who was just...stuck.
~~~
Nevertheless, I made it. I did it. In January of 2014, I transferred to Biola University. The school that has brought me so much happiness, knowledge and joy. At Biola, I have met THE MOST amazing people, and I have been able to happily grow and blossom there.
It is now Fall 2014, and unlike Fall 2013, I will be returning to Biola University. I will be able to leave. Now, when I see back-to-school ads, I get excited. I laugh and jump around the notebook isle in Target, while I sing about how I can't wait to go back.
As I type this, I'm actually beaming with excitement. I can't wait to be back in a classroom while I stake notes and intently listen to a profound lecture.
It's only a matter of time. But for now, I will spend all of the time that I can with family and friends.
Until next time,
Reyna Michelle
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