Glampfest

April 4th-5th

Hey dorks! So I guess this is the blog post where I go on about how I spent my weekend, as well as the many spiritual and mental feels that have been experienced.
By the way, I feel so official right now; considering that I am currently sitting in a Starbucks with my lovely venti iced white mocha. YUM. Delish. Okay.

So, what is happening is this little mind of mine? Sigh. Many things. Peace, maybe? Well, here's the thing. I think I am well on my way (:

My Friday started off with me waking up at 8 am to the sound of my obnoxiously peaceful alarm clock. Real talk, though. I am literally the heaviest sleeper in the world.
In the words of my friend, Abbey, "Like a bear in hibernation."
Anyyywho~ My alarm rung for about a good 7 times until I finally stopped hitting snooze and it was about 8 o clock. (I set my alarm for 7 am. That's how much I suck)
I stretched, gave my neck a little crack and eventually hopped out of bed. My little phone ever so conveniently has Pandora on it. Sooo, guess what I did. Yup! Demi Lovato radio station!

After washing up, I realized that since we're all going to be camping, perhaps it would be a swell idea to not wear make up. (The idea never occurred to me that there would be pictures taken. Merp. Oh well. You're just going to have to love my naked face.)

At around 9:30 am, I headed over to the bookstore to purchase a tiny notebook in which I could record all of my little Bible notes on.
Ooooh! The temptation to stop for a Caramel Macchiato at the Common Grounds! Nevertheless, I was a good Reyna and had succeeded with refraining myself (:
Okay, so it was so cute! As I was making my way back to my dorm in the peace of morning air, I saw that there were a lot of old people around. DUH. It was grandparents day! :D Aww, I really love old people. They are seriously the cutest. (Maybe even cuter than babies. Buuut, that's just me) As I made my way back to my dorm, I made sure to rush ahead of a few grandmothers and hold the door open for them as they mosied their little way inside for a tour. They are so cute! ^_^

So I went back into my room and happily made myself a wonderful brew of Starbucks Pike Roast Coffee from my precious little black Keurig. Literally, this thing is my little baby.
Welp, I made my bed, cleaned my room, sipped my coffee, checked my social media and headed over with my R.A and a few other girls to head over to Malibu!

Haha, okay, first off. I am the WORST when it comes to packing. I truthfully had to rush back and forth from my dorm and hallway because I was just forgetting so many things! Like: Nope. Need my eyebrow pencil. Nope. Need deodorant. Nope. Need my Carmex.
Haha Yeah, I do suck.

The ride was refreshingly peaceful, and I loved being able to look out the window and see palm trees left and right. It was great (:
We ended up in Malibu before any of the other girls and explored a tiny pier with a little farmers market inside of it.
The air was chilly and crispy. So after a while of looking out into the sea, it was about time to look into the gift store, and eventually, onward to the campsite.

We got to the camping grounds and began to joyfully merp around and climb trees. Ehh, but I didn't climb any. I would be that one kid who climbs a tree with everyone else and fall and break my neck. My uncoordinated self is just too derpy to function.

The area was beautiful, and there were times on the beach that made me love life more and more.

It's crazy. I used to be this girl who hated everything about her life. Not life itself. Just my own. Maybe such a blog post could be saved for the future, but it is a topic that is near and very dear to my little heart.

As I was sitting on the beach during devotional, I closed my eyes and breathed in the cool ocean air. Oh what a blessing it is to be alive. I'm here. I. Am. Here. I am here in the place I always wanted to live in while loving and growing closer to God. He is so majestic and amazing.

How unworthy I felt, sitting on a rock that was facing the bright blue ocean with the waves crashing and thundering ahead of me while asking God to make me stronger. Make me stronger. But how could He make a girl like me stronger when all she ever did was continue to bring herself down? To drown in the oceans of her insecurities and doubt. Who accepted living each day with a heavy heart, full of self-loath and pity.
I know what I need to do. But how? I asked him out loud and looked on towards the never ending ocean.

How..

I'll find my way. I need to love myself first. I just want to say that I did. I mean, still do. Being here at Biola has helped me love myself even more. Not even in a narcissistic way. Oh, heavens no. Everyone here is so loving, welcoming, and full of God's love. I can't wait to meet more people and love them just as much as they love me; even more, actually.

But at the same time, I don't need other people to make me feel loved. I don't need a boy to tell me I'm pretty in order for me to feel beautiful.

God wants me, all of us, to lean on Him and know of His everlasting glory.

I can't sit here on my blog and tell you to stop hating yourself. Believe me, I am the first person who will understand how almost impossible that is. But instead, lean on God.

And if you don't know how, ask Him! I sure as golly did not know how to lean on God, and that's okay. At one point, I let myself fall on my knees and begged God to show me how to lean on Him, because I was tired of having the mentality of being able to do things on my own.
There have been beautiful times where I have experienced God answering my prayers of allowing Him in my heart. Truthfully, it makes me feel the same overwhelming joy I felt the day I was saved.

I want to grow more, and I want more of Him in my life. I speak with all honesty that I really can't get enough of Him.
It was a beautiful experience, and I can't wait to meditate and continue to spiritually grow more and more as the days come.

I sat there on my rock and let out a long sigh. I looked up into the sky and smiled. My Heavenly Father is here. He is watching over all of us. Even people who feel as insignificant as I do.
I may not know why things in my family are the way they are. I may not know why these things happen. But, I know God was telling me that He's still here.

Until next time,

-Rey